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As our injury lawyers discussed in a previous article, a strong connection exists between your early childhood development and your current relationships. No matter who you are interacting with or on what level, many of your expectations, emotions, and thoughts trace back to your childhood experiences. Doctors can correct a patient’s maladaptive behaviors and beliefs. The article stressed that looking back into your past and creating new relationship patterns that can replace the less beneficial ones was the best way to control your life and become who you want to be.
A common problem exists between men and women in maintaining personal relationships. Change is seldom easy and can require support from someone you respect, love, or trust to help guide thoughts, feelings, or emotions. In an intimate relationship, you may find it challenging to maintain the intimacy level you would like.
That may be due to the natural ebb and flow of the other person’s emotions. But it may also be due to childhood inflections shading how you look at the ups and downs within those moments. The following example can help you better understand the problems that psychotherapy processes can help alter when difficulties creep up from the past and modify the relationship’s closeness.
Moreover, Heather and Eric meet and are delighted to find they are attracted to one another. As they spend more time together and become closer, Heather pulls away and becomes tense. Instead of enjoying her time with Eric, she sees his imperfections when they are together and looks for groundless reasons to become irritated with him.
Heather continues to distance herself as they spend more time together because she believes the enchantment is waning. After his motorcycle accident and disfigured face, Eric reacts to Heather’s pulling away with feelings of rejection and stress, and he begins to distance himself from Heather.
Eric sparked Heather’s interest because most people want what they can no longer have, an all too familiar pattern of past relationships. They are both repeating because each is reliving the hurt they have experienced with others. And this is how each of them coped with their pain and loss. As they begin fearing the end of their togetherness, they each start struggling for control, and because neither sees the other’s pain, they always fight the irrational irritation neither understands.
Eric responded to his pain and depression from the motorcycle crash the way he dealt with past childhood experiences. Heather discovered that her interactions with her alcoholic parents and their now distant relationship are the foundation of her fear and reactions modernly. Both uncovered childhood experiences that formed maladaptive decisions shaping how they reacted during stress and why they created reasons for emotional distancing from each other. While the childhood reactions may have once been beneficial, Eric and Heather realize that as adults, their minds reacted as children and had little bearing on their present situations. They both began to understand that their adult selves could control their lives if they altered their childhood self-thinking.
With their injury lawyer and therapist’s help, Eric and Heather realized troublesome patterns of past childhood interactions that were still controlling their adult lives. In the meantime, Eric’s lawyer now must prove that all of these therapy bills were reasonable and necessary charges to assist in Eric’s brain injury healing process. This change in thought patterns permitted them to live in a relationship that adapted to their new way of thinking and allowed them to become closer.
Keep reading our articles and blogs about brainwave pathophysiology to understand better what our brain injury lawyers can do for you. Or, if you need to speak to a personal injury legal counselor near you right now, call (213) 596-9642. We’ll listen to your version of the case, review records and official reports and see if we can help you heal financially and physically.
Michael is a managing partner at the nationwide Ehline Law Firm, Personal Injury Attorneys, APLC. He’s an inactive Marine and became a lawyer in the California State Bar Law Office Study Program, later receiving his J.D. from UWLA School of Law. Michael has won some of the world’s largest motorcycle accident settlements.